"Authentic Prayer Changes Us" -- St. Teresa of Avila

Last night at my first JustFaith meeting, the opening prayer included the title quote from St. Teresa of Avila.  What struck me about it, is how true that is.  And how the question following it, "Do you really wish to be turned into fire" is at the crux of the dilemma of the good life.

Do I truly want to be burned and melted and transformed?  I've prayed for iffy things before, like patience.  I jokingly used to tell my teens that when I prayed for patience, I was hired as a youth ministry coordinator, so that I could cultivate the virtue.  Joke or not, I find that we should be careful what we pray for, because, as Teresa mentions, prayer changes us.

I ended up in my job now because of prayer.  I'm working here and here and several other places.  What's interesting, is that my life as a little friend for peace has developed in ways I never foresaw.  My income is in a precarious situation.  And yet, Dorothy Day talks about how true poverty, true solidarity with the poor is couched in precarity and risk. 

So far, I've chosen, with my free will, to live in a way that is environmentally sound (as much as possible) by purchasing locally, recycling, watching waste, unplugging appliances, etc.  Still though, my life has had a certain sense of stability, of security.  As an employee of the Catholic Church, I wasn't necessarily paid high wages, but I did have job security.  And I had health benefits.  I knew that I could count on a set income every month and could budget accordingly, albeit tightly.

The difference now, is that I have no idea what my income will be.  This forces me to live in a precarious situation.  Still though, it is a precariousness that I can afford to embrace.  If I were responsible for a family, it would not be the same.  I only have my own life that I'm putting on the line, not others'.

Yesterday I was at Perry School and worked with some of the kids in the peace room.  It was wonderful to see some of them again (Omar, Jordan), and great to meet new ones I hadn't yet encountered (Albert, James).  We had two great helpers-- Becky (an intern) and Kwacu (spelling?).  Kwacu is here, from Ghana, where he had worked with street kids to teach drumming.  We did peace drums with the kids and it was so good for these 7 and 8 year old boys to have a young man there, working with them, enabling them to beat on the jambe.  It was beautiful.

Today, I encountered peacemaking at work, where my co-workers so vividly showed me what it was like to be Christ to others.  The kindness and gentleness and passion of our conversations just continues to make my day a joyful day, even amidst the chaos of hurting eyes and headaches.

Struggles today in being a peacemaker-- speaking with people in a short sort of way, especially those closest to me.  Sometimes, well, for me, often, it's most difficult to live peacefully with those we love and know the most.  Kinda like Jesus in his hometown, but reversed.

I also recognized that there are some people in my life where I'm really struggling to see God's presence in them. It's 'easy' for me to imagine that I can love them or see their dignity, but it is much more challenging to see that they, too, in their lives, image Christ.  This is especially hard with people where our encounters have been heated, charged, or have excess negative baggage.  I think that when those relationships in our life are in order, we will find that we, as a community, are moving closer to a more peace-filled world.

Week 1

Well, my first week working for the Franciscan Action Network is over and it was a mouthful of a week.  As a little friend for peace, I'm trying to live peacefully in all walks of my life.  For me, this means that I need a few hours in the morning to get up and face the day.  Now, it's not that I'm not a morning person, it just is that I take a while to get going in a peaceful manner.  If I had to, I could be up and out in 20 minutes, but I'd be rushed and scattered a bit.  I much prefer waking up at 7, as the light streams in the window, and then sitting with coffee and morning quiet until I have to leave for work at 9:15 or 9:30 to catch the metro downtown.
Things I really like about my job:
1) Metro-accessible! I'm so excited that I can take public transportation and reduce my carbon footprint
2) The people I work with! Everyone in the office is excited about the public advocacy and action alerts that we do.  Since we're Franciscan-based, our foci are: immigration, environment, health care and peacemaking.  I see how my coworkers, at least in the office, really live what we're fighting for.

I think the hardest thing about peacemaking for me though, is when I run into people who are fighting strongly for things that seem to be opposite to what matters to me.  I don't have an easy time understanding greed or seeing how people could not care for the poor and disenfranchised.


Tomorrow I start a class called JustFaith which is supposed to further expose us to Catholic Social Teaching. I'm excited for it and for what I might learn in addition to what I already know.

Tomorrow also starts week 2 of peacemaking as a living.  Let's see how it goes. :)  I'm not sure how much I'll be able to post, but my goal is to track things at least 2x a week.  I want to talk about peacemakers that I meet as well-- both in work and in books.  So, I'll try to feature some of them.